from here to there and everywhere & back to Union Square when do i get some sleep?

Writing a draft of this blog on Saturday the 20th at 11:00 PM in possibly the world's most gag-reflex-inducing EconoLodge. You get whatcha pay for but I don't fucking care. Needed to get out of car. Don't know if earlier blog went through or not, as I sent it as a message from my cellphone.

Got a call from the woman I spoke to at the NY/BN the other day- asking me to come in and talk to her about a job. Yaay! Originally when we spoke, she asked me to stop by Sunday night, which was when I was planning on getting there, so this is better- I won't have just been in a car for two days straight & I'll be able to really shower before I go, which I find always makes a much better impression on people.

This morning was really hard... It's insane, but it hasn't been until the last couple of days that it's starting to hit me that I'm leaving my mom & brother behind. This SUCKS so much & I wish there was some way it was possible for them to move up too. Or even to like, Jersey or something. Albany, I don't know. Saying goodbye was really not fun & I tried to not be sad, because I didn't want them to be sad... but driving away I was looking out the window and wondering WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?? I'm leaving my best friends behind. I'm going SO far away from them with no idea when the next time we'll all be together is. It made me start to think again about why I'm doing this. And I understood that what I'm doing is what I need to be doing. I need to take some steps towards independence & adulthood. I'm thirty fucking one. It's time to act my age. And as much as I want all of this so much, there's that flipside where I'm like- WHY?? But it's all good. We drove for like 14 hours today- so we've got a 6 hour trip tomorrow which lands us up there around noonish. Which is good, we can dump the U-Haul before they close at five. And after that...
  who knows? I'm definitely starting a diet this week.
-reading (trying to) MIRROR MIRROR by Gregory Maguire before bed.

Sunday- 11:39 PM
got to Brooklyn this afternoon around 1:00 or so. our place is really cute, definitely needs some work but nothing ginormous or anything. i'm pretty happy. Brooklyn seems so cool thus far. Anyway, my dad & i dropped the trailer off at U-Haul, I came back here & had pizza with X+J- Delicious. Then spent the rest of the night organizing the appalling amount of stuff that I brought with me (I'm camping out in one of the rooms until we know whether or not Lily will be here, so no real unpacking yet) and watching them play "Gabriel Knight". Surprisingly beat now. Tomorrow I'm going to try out the F train & scope out Union Square to get ready for my interview thing on Tuesday. Did finally have the sad realization today that I really don't know what I'll be eating besides peanut butter sandwiches & take out as there is absolutely nothing that I can cook... it'll be good for the whole weight loss situation, though, so we'll just think of it as a crazy new diet. then i'll write a book and make gazillions of dollars and have signings at the very Barnes & Noble I used to work at!!
the ceiling in this room are really high and the walls, very yellow. Very Rosemary's Baby kind of yellow. and did i mention that there's a print of Picasso's Guernica in this room? Well there is. I'm going to have some interesting dreams tonight- or will wake up with a good scare.